The Desires of Your Heart

Psalm 37:3-4

Trust in the Lord and do good; dwell in the land and cultivate faithfulness.

Delight yourself in the LORD; and He will give you the desires of your heart. (NASB)

I don’t know about you, but sometimes, I find myself questioning, “What really is my heart’s true desire?”

This morning, during my quiet time, I was focused on this scripture, and as I read I sensed the Holy Spirit saying ‘Do good, that I should be happy with what I’ve been given, and that it’s important for me to keep growing in my Christian walk. A walk that portrays a life journey where my heart and soul know that I can win, in this race called life, and I can do it for the glory of my Lord, Jesus Christ.

I’ve been a Christian long enough to know what that means. But, continue asking, “Why do I always seem to be just going through the motions and not surrendering all my choices to fully embrace God’s word? And, “What is it that seems to get in my way of having the heart for more intimacy with Jesus?”

How have I become so apathetic to ignore His pleas only to take delight in what’s temporary and rationalize that ‘I’ll be okay when I get that old-familiar feel-good feeling of a real job to pay for what I think my heart’s desire is, a new car, hardwood floors, furniture, or a new mattress.’ We Christians like to call this materialism. Then, I think, is this old worn out orb that we all live on, along with all its evil, child abuse, civil disobedience, suffering, and torture, worth it? Is this all we have to live for? God’s word says,

I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world.”John 16:33 (NLT)

I do believe that my struggle with this question is just one of Satan’s ploys to keep from basking in the intimacy that only Christ can give me. My relentless adversary likes to smack me down with “He doesn’t want anything to do with you! Or, “You’re not good enough. Remember when…It’s a waste of your time! Get busy with something else!” The list of assaults goes on and on…

…that’s when it’s time to close my office door and insert my CD of Mercy Me’s, The Hurt and the Healer. God meets me in the words of that song and my soul gets lost in complete surrender at the awesomeness of my Savior. My spirit is renewed and finally, I’m at peace because I know that I’m kneeling at the feet, or resting in the arms of the One who gave His life for me.

You know what? He’s given His life for you too!

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God’s Purpose or Mine?

Four boxes of Made New ~ A Hippie Chick’s Journey of Forgiveness arrived via UPS yesterday and this morning they’re sitting in my basement, seemingly staring back at me each time I walk by. I find myself struggling with overwhelming feelings of despair, and how God will open the right doors to share their message. 

Last Sunday, a godly man from church told Pete and I how important it would be to pray over them before we even thought about opening the first box. So, Pete and I lay hands on the stack and specifically prayed, thanking God for the perseverance to witness this accomplishment in our lives, as well as what He will do in lives we’ll never know anything about. 

Despite my anxieties, the Lord had some reassuring words to impart to my soul from my devotional, My Utmost for His Highest. This message reminded me of exactly what my heart and weary soul needed. 

A quote from the words of Oswald Chambers,

We tend to think that if Jesus Christ compels us to do something and we are obedient to Him, He will lead us to great success. We should never have the thought that our dreams of success are God’s purpose for us. In fact, His purpose may be exactly the opposite. We have the idea that God is leading us toward a particular end or a desired goal, but He is not. The question of whether or not we arrive at a particular goal is of little importance, and reaching it becomes merely an episode along the way. What we see as only the process of reaching a particular end, God sees as the goal itself. 

What is my vision of God’s purpose for me? Whatever it may be, His purpose is for me to depend on Him and on His power now. If I can stay calm, faithful, and unconfused while in the middle of the turmoil of life, the goal of the purpose of God is being accomplished in me. God is not working toward a particular finish-His purpose is the process itself. What He desires for me is that I see “Him walking on the sea” with no shore, no success, nor goal in sight, but simply having the absolute certainty that everything is all right because I see “Him walking on the sea” (Mark 6:49) It is the process, not the outcome, that is glorifying to God. 

God’s training is for now, not later. His purpose is for this very minute, not sometime in the future. We have nothing to do with what will follow our obedience, and we are wrong to concern ourselves with it. What people call preparation, God sees the goal itself. 

God’s purpose is to enable me to see that He can walk on the storms of my life right now. If we have a further goal in mind, we are not paying enough attention to the present time. However, if we realize that moment-by-moment obedience is the goal, then each moment as it comes is precious. 

Writing Made New ~ A Hippie Chick’s Journey has been God-inspired indeed. Yet, the purpose of this book isn’t about my goals, but about what God wants to accomplish, while I trust Him for the outcome and His desire for my life! 

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